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发表于 2015-6-6 22:11:51
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這個翻譯簡直不堪入目,例如 Franks 竟然是佛蘭克而不是人所共知的法蘭克,遊戲首個目標明明是 fight bravely in the battle at Suentel Mountain (於辛特爾山脈奮戰)卻變成了「(搜尋)辛特爾山脈之戰中的勇士」。
二樓回帖者雖然不知道本作是征服者資料片推出前的作品而沒有改名觸發,然而樓主點評回應也反映他根本不清楚戰役流程,而事實上任務原文老早標記 Count Worad (Guy Josselyne) ,譯文卻將括號內容刪除。同樣,四樓以下一直在討論巴伐利亞是否薩克森屬地,譯者附和其中,卻未發現原作、譯本實際根本沒有出現這一錯誤。
以下再以歷史文字為例:
In 782 AD the Sorbs threatened the Eastern boarders of Franconia. Charles orders the East Frankish army to fight against these attacks. The troops then march towards the river Elbe ...
在公元782年,索布威胁到了弗兰肯帝国的东部边界。查理曼指挥东弗兰肯军队来阻止这场入侵。于是各个部队前进到了易北河……
- Sorbs 為索布人。
- Franconia 與 Frankish 慣例譯法俱以「法」字起首。
At the same time the Saxons revolt once more. Duke Widukind who has just returned from Denmark is at their head. He could quickly gather his loyal men around him to fight against the Franks and the Church. Frisian troops joined Widukind supporting him greatly with weapons. The Counts of the Western districts, who were not liked by the Saxons, were caught and killed. Priests and monks died for their faith. Churches and monasteries were burnt down once more and everything Charles had achieved so far seemed to be destroyed.
与此同时,萨克森在来自丹麦的维杜金德公爵的领导下再次起义。他能迅速地召集他忠实的属下对抗弗兰肯和教会。弗里斯兰的部队投靠了维杜金德并得到了数量庞大的军队。那些反抗的伯爵们都被萨克森人抓起来杀光了。祭司和僧侣用他们的生命实现了他们的诺言。教会和修道院再次处于水深火热之中,而查理曼到现在为止还没有做出什么能改变现状的事。
- 沒有證據顯示維杜金德是丹麥人,原文描述是「從丹麥歸來」,「來自丹麥」不妥。
- 提供武器(weapons)不知何故變成提供軍隊。
- 起義者推翻和屠殺不受歡迎的一眾西區伯爵反而變成對方「反抗」。
- 信仰(faith)誤解成為「諾言」,而且整句簡單譯成殉教即可。
- 燒燬(burnt down)不是「水深火熱」。
- 最後一句應該是指查理曼到現在為止一切的努力(成就)都被糟蹋(破壞)了。
When the commanders of the East Frankish army received this message, they stopped their campaign against the Sorbs and hurried back. At the Suentel Mountains they fight the Saxon army without waiting for the approaching support. After a rash attack the Frankish army is utterly destroyed. It is said that the Frisians contributed significantly to the Saxon victory.
当东弗兰肯军队的首领们得到了这个消息时,他们立刻结束了即将胜利的战争,并立刻撤退。在辛特尔山脉,他们觉得在等待援军到来之前就发起对萨克森军队的战斗。于是弗兰肯德军队被轻松击败了。根据记载,弗里斯兰人在这次胜利中也起到至关重要的作用。
- 第一段只是沒了「人」字,這裡整個對索布人的戰役都消失了,變成什麼「即將勝利」。
- Frankish 音譯又變成了「佛蘭肯德」,與第一段的「佛蘭肯」不統一,當然正常還是應該叫法蘭克。
When King Charles heard about this defeat, he immediately hurried along with his core units. This time, there were no peace negotiations and no mercy. All summer and winter in 782 Charles' punitive expedition pursued even the smallest Saxon unit. Wherever they ran into armed Saxons they started a fight. Farms were burnt down and fields were devastated. Charles had the Saxon Counts who were in his service come to see him and then ordered all the Saxon nobility to gather in Verden on the river Aller. In an unprecedented act of rage he convicted them all of high treason against the State and the Church and had 4,500 of the most noble Saxons beheaded. The bloodbath of Verden was one of the blackest days in German history.
当查理曼国王听说了这次惨败后,他马上赶到了那里。这次他没有进行任何和平谈判,也没有任何慈悲。整个公元782年的夏天和冬天,查理曼的反击部队毁灭了每一个萨克森人。无论他们到哪里,只要遇到萨克森的军队,就会发起战斗。农田被烧毁,地面被踏平。查理曼派人找到那些萨克森伯爵,并命令所有的萨克森贵族都要赶到阿勒尔河河畔的弗登镇会面。他愤怒地对背叛国家和教会的萨克森人进行谴责,并决定斩首4500个萨克森贵族。弗登大屠杀是德国历史上最阴暗的日子之一。
- 查理曼的主力部隊(core units)消失了。
- no mercy 不能直譯「沒有任何慈悲」,應該叫作毫不留情。
- All summer and winter 實際是指整年,未宜直譯,當作寒暑不斷。
- punitive expedition 指討伐(軍)而非「反擊部隊」。
- who were in his service 未譯。
- 「前所未見」(unprecedented)未譯。
- 「對背叛國家和教會的薩克森人進行譴責」一句主客逆轉,查理曼所做的是在該處判定他們犯下叛國大罪。
- 德國在十九世紀前並不存在, German 一詞本文基本仍指種族而言,該譯作德意志或日耳曼。
Fights were to proceed until the Heathen Saxons who had broken their oath had either been annihilated or had converted to Christianity. From now on Charlemagne's army was accompanied by monks and priests. This started one of the sadest chapters in German history, the act of destroying and trying to wipe out one of the largest Germanic people serving the Pope ...
另外,直到萨克森的异教徒和那些违背誓言的人不是死了就是投靠基督教以后,战争才停止。从现在开始查理曼的军队被僧侣和祭司护送。德国历史上另又一个悲惨的篇章开始了——在教皇的意愿下对德国最伟大的民族之一进行摧毁甚至灭绝……
- 「違背誓言」是指叛離忠於教會之約,原文行文及意思都沒有將之與「異教」區分開來。
- 軍隊祇會「帶上」僧侶,不會要由僧侶「護送」。
勝利、失敗文字亦然,同樣錯得離譜:
In 783 AD the Saxons fought the Franks for the first time in two open battles. There was no victor in the first battle, the second battle, however, was won by Charlemagne due to his skills as a commander. After that the Saxons never again attempted an open battle.
在公元783年,萨克森人以两场明面上的战斗首次反抗弗兰肯人。在第一场战斗后并没有一个明确的胜利者,但是查理曼成功地——用他的战略——决定了第二场战斗。在那之后萨克森人就再也没有冒险发起任何一场明面上的战斗。
- open battle 是指正面戰鬥,「明面上的戰鬥」意思不明。
- due to his skill as a commander 當譯運籌帷幄。
- won 明明是打贏卻變成了意思不明的「決定」。
In 785 AD Charlemagne reaches the river Elbe. There is no further Saxon resistance. Saxon's Duke Widukind, who was able to escape again and again in all those years, surrenders to the superior strength of the Franks and wishes to be baptized. Saxon's nobility gives up fighting. The peasants, however, carried on fighting for 20 years. The German nation developed from the unification of Bavaria, Saxony und Franconia.
公元785年,查理曼把战线推进到易北河。于是萨克森人的反抗彻底被瓦解。萨克森公爵维杜金德,在这些年的逃亡后,最终被弗兰肯的精锐部队包围,并在他自己的要求下做了洗礼。当农民们也开始战斗的时候,萨克森的贵族放弃了。最终德国成为巴伐利亚、萨克森和弗兰肯的组合。
- 「這些年」意思與長年、經年有別,就算直譯也應該是「那些年」。
- 「一再」(again and again)未譯。
- 優勢武力(superior strength)並非「精銳部隊」。
- 「投降」(surrender)不是「包圍」(surround)。
- 次末句是指貴族放棄抗爭但農民仍持續抗戰二十餘年,譯文將這意思倒轉過來。
- 末句是指德意志民族在巴、薩、佛三地統一後得以發展民族意識,並非構建實際政體。
Oh dear, you were not able to conquer the Saxons with the help of Charlemagne's army. The Saxons still do not seem to be able to break with their Heathen faith.
好吧,你没有能力用查理曼的军队征服萨克森人。还没到那个时候,那个萨克森人因他们自己的古老的异教信仰分裂的时候。
- 原文 break with ... Heathen faith 是指離開異教皈依教會,譯文卻成為風馬牛不相及的「因……異教信仰分裂」。
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